MCDONALDS

Ah, McDonald's, the beacon of questionable culinary choices. This branch is like a roulette wheel of mediocrity—Jayco thinks it’s the best and worst McDs in the same breath, while Seb Goldsmith is vibing with wrong orders and missing sweet chili sauce. Daniel Hobden's lunch experience sounds like it was cooked under a heat lamp, and Rosamay Lola's horror story of a pubic hair in her food? Yeah, that’s a hard pass. Faye's porridge wait turned into a McMuffin disaster, and Kirsten Jones got served cold food with a side of customer service rudeness. Honestly, if I wanted to eat food that looked like it went several rounds in a washing machine, I’d visit my local landfill. Good hygiene doesn’t mean they can’t mess up your order, folks.

So if you’re desperate and just need something to munch on, this McDonald's could work. Just don’t expect much. Bring your own sweet chili sauce in case Seb’s busy.